I Fail Evry Day

Yes, I see, I spelled every wrong in the title. I left it there on purpose. I fail all the time. I get things wrong all day long. I put so much pressure on myself to get things right that I get uptight and get them wrong. Wrong, wrong, wait for it..... wrong! There are times when I get so upset and frustrated I cry (fail). Maybe not on the outside, but inside I feel like Cinderella when her step sisters tore her gorgous dress apart. Crushed and hopeless, basically a hot mess. My want of perfection or at the least a yummy healthy dinner, puts strain on my marriage and my relationship with my kids (fail). When I am stressed and upset I tend to snap easily (fail). So I push my loved ones away (fail), trying to make things perfect for my loved ones!? So insane!!!
My point here is I am going to breath and except my failures. I will laugh and turn them into learning oppurtunities for my family. It is not to late to teach my children anything! After all, its just dust in the wind. At the end of the day I know I want my family to be in peace and see Gods love through me, not avoiding the emotional mess that I can be. I will remember Martha and Mary:
But the Lord answered her "Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is nesacary, Mary has chosen the good portion and it will not be taken from her." 
 Luke 10:41-42
The good portion in this verse is time with Jesus. FYI : time with Jesus is super important! But it does not mean you have to be reading the bible all day, but in connection with him all day. Talk to him like He is in the room with you. Well because truthfully He is.

"Jesus I am not going to let these worldy wants of perfection ruin my peace I have been given by you."
"Oh Jesus, I've burnt the pancakes again, it's a good thing my soul wont burn lol!"
" We are eating fast food again, even though its not the way I want to eat, bless it to our bodies anyway and bless the hands that made it too"
" My house is not as neat as I want it to be Jesus, good thing my soul is white as snow!"
" I want to yell at my kids again, why cant they just do things the first time I ask? Oh your right, I have a hard time doing things you ask the first time too."
"Why cant I be more like so and so?

It seems funny to talk outloud to an empty room or maybe not empty if your family is home. But it will help. I will show my kids going to God all thee time and talking it out helps! I am not a failure, but a work in progress. A work that will only be finished as I enter the gates of Heaven.

Love,
Ashley B.